Thoughts about Comments

I really enjoyed taking time to read all of the comments on my post today! Admittedly, I do not go back and read these as much as I should. While I was reading over them, there were two things that really stood out to me.

The first, was when people quoted back part of my story to give an example as to what they were referring to. To me, this proved that they actually read the story and could site the parts that interested them or made them think. I think it shows a certain level of attention when someone can do this.

Also, I liked when people asked good questions about something I had written. This also showed me that they were thinking while they read my post and were interested in the material enough to follow up. This made me feel like they actually enjoyed reading what I had written and wanted to know more! I think this is a good way to compliment someone subtly in a more meaningful way than saying "good story!". 

When writing my comments, I would like to start doing both of the things I mentioned above. I write people a lot of compliments about what they have posted. However, I think I could give more meaningful feedback by asking questions, siting what I was talking about when complimenting or critiquing, and just seeming more interested in general. Also, I would have liked more constructive criticism on my blog as well. While its not always fun to read, I do believe it helps me develop into a better writer and I am interested on what people like or don't like. Lastly, I would like it if some people posted some storytelling ideas that they might have used for the story. I struggle to think of creative ways to write sometimes when I am trying to do the assignment, so I think it might help me to read other people's interpretations of how they would have done it and have more styles in mind to use. I want to add both of these methods into my comment writing, but in a nice way so that people don't think I'm hating on their story! 

Storytelling Week 5: Calm down, Set.

Kor- The therapist

Set- brother of Osiris

Kor: Ok, Set, why don't you come in and sit down?

Set: Don't tell me what to do. I am the next ruler of the great land of Egypt.

Kor: Ok, we can talk about that, but not until you sit down. 

*Set sits down in a huff. Crosses his arms and leans back in the chair.*

How Set might look pouting about the therapy session
Photo by: Paul Cezanne (1839-1906)

Set: Ok, fine. Are you happy now?

Kor: Yes, now lets get started. I'm sensing a lot of anger. Do you want to talk about it?

Set: Um, yea I'm angry. Of course I am. I was supposed to be the next ruler of Egypt and my brother stole it out from under me. Now he rules and everyone worships him because he's sooo nice and such a good leader. He's not nice! He's just weak. 

Kor: That's interesting you say that. What do you think about the fact that he's led Egypt so well? Think about everything he's done. He's led Egypt in the right direction by directing them to be holy and righteous people. There are so many beautiful temples everywhere and the country has been without war for many years since he is so focused on peaceful negotiations. 

Set: Yes, but the country could be so much larger. So much stronger! I know that my way is the right way and he refuses to see it. 

Kor: Maybe you could try to bring it up to him? Have you calmly and clearly asked him if he would ever consider your ways and possibly handle a conflict according to the way you would? 

Set: NO! I'm not going to sit down with him! I can barely stand in the same room as him. I can't stand him!

Kor: Ok, you seem to be getting angry again. Let's try some deep breathing exercises.

*Set breathes in and out. The tone of his voice does relax some, but he continues.

Kor: Ok, would you like to continue? The first step to dealing with this conflict is for you to get it all off your chest. Then, I can help you try to move on.

Set: I doubt I'll ever just move on but we'll give it a try. I feel like you'll never let me go if I don't and I just want this to be over.

Kor: That is probably true. The officials are very nervous about your high level of anger. They don't want you to make any rash decisions. 

An illustration of Set
Created by Jeff Dahl

*Set rolls his eyes*

Set: Ok, well next I want to talk about his wife. She is stronger than me. That is weird.

Kor: Why do you think that bothers you?

Set: Because! She's a woman! She shouldn't be stronger than me. She's also way too smart. She must have spies everywhere or magical powers where she can see my every move. Every plan I have to try and usurp Osiris, she intercepts! I have strong number of followers, you know, and I could totally do it. But they're losing faith in me because none of my plans go through. Its just so annoying.

Kor: Yes, I could understand how that would be frustrating. I think a lot of time, men do have problems with women being stronger and outsmarting them. It threatens their sense of manliness. However, if you can overcome this, you will start to feel secure in yourself and will have more faith in yourself. This will help you lead your followers in a confident manner and not seem like you are flailing around for ideas. However, I must warn you that I cannot support you trying to recruit a rebellious army to overthrow Osiris. 

Set: Aren't you supposed to just listen to my problems? I don't care to hear your advice.

Kor: That may be the case and it's time for this session to be over anyways. For now, my advice to you would be to let go of your jealousy. I hope you can realize that its actually holding you back. You could be a great official, the right hand to your brother if you wanted, but you are so jealous that you are only focused on overthrowing him. Now, you're scrambling to lead a rebellious army when you could lead so much more. For now though, I think this is great progress. Same time next week?

Kor: I don't think I have a choice. 

Author's Note:

This week, I decided to write my story using the "therapy session" storytelling style. I chose this style because I thought it would be a good way to talk about the jealousy and anger that Set holds against his brother, Osiris. I wrote this story based off of Osiris in the Ancient Egypt unit. The story is focused on Osiris and how he led Egypt during the time he was the ruler. He ruled after Ra, and was known for leading Egypt using a very peaceful and calm style. He encouraged the people to be very faithful to the gods, build temples, and to deal very calmly with other nations. He was known of as "Osiris the Good." Isis, his wife, stood by him and was his faithful companion. While Osiris, was traveling, he trusted his wife to rule the empire in his place. His brother, however, was extremely jealous of him and angry that Osiris was the one to rule Egypt. He believed in war and his heart was full of evil. Later in the unit, it tells the story of how Osiris is killed and Set takes over his position to be the tyrannous ruler of Egypt. 

Bibliography: 

Osiris from Egyptian Myth and Legend by Donald Mackenzie (1907). 

Week 5 Reading Diary: Egyptian Myth and Legend

This week, I am reading from the Ancient Egypt unit which pulls stories from Egyptian Myth and Legend by Donald Mackenzie. 

The first story was really intriguing to me because it tells the story of Creation as told by the Ancient Egyptians. Due to my Christian upbringing, I had never explored other creation stories. I really enjoyed the Egyptian's take though. I thought it was interesting how each being created was a ruler of one specific element of the Earth. I also liked how the Earth came from a "waste of water" because it really felt like a rebirth story. The water was waste and the Earth came up out of it. 

I was very intrigued by Ra in the story called The Secret Name of Ra. I am very curious why the Egyptians chose to describe him as an older being that had moisture dripping from his mouth as he spake. This is very different from the Christian ideas of God in that God in the Bible does not age. I like how Isis overpowered Ra and stopped at nothing to get the power she wanted. To me, this aligns with how women in today's society will stop at nothing to get the power or position they desire. In my storytelling, I would like to create a strong female character that is more cunning than her male counterpart. 

Ra, the ancient Egyptian sun god.
Photo by: Jeff Dahl (2007)

I really enjoyed the story of Osiris because of the peaceful way he chose to rule Egypt. I also liked how Isis and Osiris put on a very united front and ruled Egypt together. They seemed to be an ancient power couple. In my future writings, I would like to include a relationship like theirs. 

The Journey of Isis made me sad because of the intensity of Isis's grief. I can't imagine how it would feel to lose my husband and search for his body only for it to be thrown out again once I found it. I liked how the story gave the powerful goddess a very human side that was very relatable. I always think of goddesses as these powerful beings that are not affected by emotions the same way that humans are. However, this story showed me differently. 

The goddess Isis. Photo by: Jeff Dahl (2007)

I'm confused why the youth was taken into the water, never to be seen again by the crocodile in The Wax Crocodile. I guess it was just the fact that the youth was supposed to be following the Pharaoh rather than sneaking off to visit his lover? If I were the woman, I would be extremely upset that I was having to suffer for my lover's mistakes. Maybe a storytelling idea could be to rewrite this story with a different ending to characterize the woman as more triumphant.